DStilled

Engaging Theology

Christians have been using imagery of light and darkness since the time of Jesus. Light is powerful because it shows what is hidden. It takes what is mysterious and makes it known. Light takes the shameful and unwanted and gives it a place to reside. The absence of light is gloomy, fearful, and a place where evil lives. Karl Barth emphatically illustrates that we cannot even know our own sin except in the light of Jesus Christ because Christ is the only light that illuminates sin. Sin loves to hide in the deep recesses of our souls and minds and God as Jesus is the only One who can enlighten us to that knowledge.

Barth believes fundamentally in the purpose and power of Jesus Christ. He understands that the idea of the Trinity is based around not God the Father, but God the Son. In Barth’s theology Jesus is the fulfillment of a purpose of God in that humankind is brought to salvation. This act not only demonstrates (His) power over sin and its consequences but also amplifies (His) glory though grace. Barth calls Jesus the second article (second revelation of God). “Indeed, the second article does not just follow the first, nor does it just precede the third; but it is the fountain of light by which the other two are lit.”

This “fountain of light” shows us not only does Jesus clarify our own lives but also is the clearest image of Who God is. Barth demands that we move beyond the three Person idea of God and grow toward a more unified image of the Holy One most authentically pictured in Jesus Christ. “From the unity of the Godhead God Himself comes forth in the form of a Son. Now God is this Other in God and proceeding from God.” Only after we realize that Jesus is the center of creation and the story God had in mind from the beginning can we come to grips with the idea that Jesus was not an afterthought. Jesus was not God’s idea of saving us after we messed up everything with our pungent sin. Jesus’ plan was the original plan before the creation of the world, sin, or you and me.

Jesus loves us more than comprehension allows. “He who from eternity willed to become man for our good, has become man in time for our good, will be and remain man in eternity for our good.” Sin and all of its destruction could not hide in the darkness for long. In fact, Barth would say that God knew it was there all along; it is only we who thought our sin was undisclosed. Sin is a very personal thing that we humans cling to. We need the brilliant light of Jesus to shine down into our crevasses to show us the error of our ways. Conscience and morality alone will not do it. “Only from the depths of all God has done for us can it be made clear that we find ourselves in misery.”

I agree with Barth’s theology about Jesus and sin in our lives. “Jesus Christ is man’s salvation in all circumstances an in face of all that darkens his life, including the evil that proceeds from himself. There is nothing that is not already made good in this happening, that God became man for our good.” The power of this thought enlivens me to the point of celebration! I believe that I am a sinful wretch that wallows in my own self-absorption and pride. I believe that God in the form of Jesus both illuminates my dark places and heals them for (His) glory. I believe that it is only through the Christ that I can know myself and know God.

How I will live my life theologically depends on who God is to me. This is true for anyone. I believe as Barth says, “This work of the Son of God includes the work of the Father as its presupposition and the work of the Holy Spirit as its consequence. The first article is to a certain extent the source, the third article is the goal of our path. But the second article is the Way upon which we find ourselves in faith.” It is on this Path that I will live my life. Not that I have already obtained my goal; but I leave the illuminated sin behind me and strive on toward the light of Jesus.

By the way, the 23rd was Garrett’s bday!  He turned 17.  Also yay for rain and my Dad’s Dad is moving in with my folks for a time down in Lexington.  He had some surgeries and needs outpatient care regularly at Cardinal Hill.  Also, I’ve never written more in one day than did on just on Wed (16 pages).

There and back again…a hippie’s tale

For all of you who concerned about my sickness, I am better now so thank you. Better physically at least. Living in the tension only got harder because of my road trip I just took. (1400 miles basically to DC and back.) The reason for this was that I immersed myself back into the very conservative Christian network that I had at UVa. Specifically Matt (the proud half-Asian) and Aaron (the one throwing the frisbee). Besides being really great and caring guys, they have a knowledge and a passion for the Bible that I can only dream of. Not just that, but they seek to do God’s will in every facet of their lives. Aaron is about to go travel the world (Vatican, Israel, Uganda) to discern what God’s next step for him in life is. Inerrancy of the Bible is a big big deal and it’s amazing how much that shapes what they do. Here I am wholly questioning its legitimacy and to them such is utterly blasphemous. I really don’t know where I’m going to land on this subject as far as what I believe but I really appreciated spending time with them and others talking about spiritual matters. NO ONE at seminary comes from such a “right” perspective so I don’t get the balance for my search for truth.

I also got to see Jason and Anastasia on this trip. I knew before it was going to happen but on Sunday, they got ENGAGED! It was great to hear them recount it for us. Basically, Jason set up a scavenger hunt with the ring at the end. He definitely got props from both men and women for the plan and execution.

Unlike my seminary friends, the UVa bunch never knew me with anything but short hair. So going back, I threw them off with my “Jesus Hippie” appearance. Jason Matthews (who I got to see in DC and whose Angry Turtles lost to my Sabered Horsemen!) spoke of a mane around my head. I also saw Jonathan and Todd in DC and then Christa in Maryland. She just finished a year working for a Jesuit Volunteer program in San Antonio and in a couple of weeks is off to southern Peru for a two year stint of the international chapter for the Jesuits. I don’t know how many more times I will be able to see peeps in VA as the last of those I know are spreading out even more so. I guess like in all networks (including the brain), as the whole diversifies the parts specialize. Time to embrace where I am. The problem is, that includes a ten page midterm due Wed. Yay for school.  Speaking of procrastination, I was playing on Google Maps and thought I’d test out how far I could drive in one day from Louisville.  If I have someone with me for the whole day then I can get a bit over 1100 miles.  That equals day trips to Quebec, Denver, Miami, San Antonio, or maybe even Winnipeg.  That is basically the entire eastern half the US.  So a four day road trip anyone?

Sickly

Have you ever had salmonella poisoning?  Let’s hope not.  Cuz it’s possible I just did and it was awful.  The reason I don’t think it was salmonella is that the chicken in question was eaten almost a week before I got sick.  But I had a fever and that generally means infection.  I won’t bore you with all the wonderful details but it started Sunday and I think I’m just now officially over it.  It is of course possible that this debilitation was psychosomatic.  What that means is something happened or was perceived to about to happen and my body freaked out.  Yes my brain was overloading and the onslaught of stress was onslaughting.  I say that I’m immune to stress because I don’t get tense.  Maybe that’s true.  I honestly don’t get tense in my muscles at all.  That doesn’t necessitate the absence of stress though.  As I look back in my life and specific times when I would cry randomly (almost always during a song while I was driving) or get real jittery (when I let Spanish homework or work at NTB get to me) then I see those as my body releasing the stress that I experience as a normal person under sometimes more than normal situations.  The crying was cathartic but the shakiness wasn’t cool.  I usually (and still kinda do) thought it was a lack of sugar, calcium, or other nutrients in my system.  All this to say that I think my body is under a tremendous amount of stress and I am flippant/neglectful about it.  Shortly after I arrived here I watched the film A.I. and bawled during the last half hour of the movie.  Sure it’s a powerful film and worth crying with but I hadn’t let go that much since The Passion.  My most natural reaction to stress is to sleep.  That certainly would explain why I’ve spent most of my life capable of sleeping 10-14 hours a night.  I release my worries out through the unconscious.  I escape.  All this to say that we don’t know the power the mind has over the body.  Buddhist monks can meditate themselves warm in a freezer.  They can virtually stop their own heart beats.  It is possible the test I was supposed to take and the class I was supposed to lead on Tue added on top of returning from home mixed in with the other 11 things I’m struggling with (some of which are of theological significance) just tripped the circuit.  One of the most common advices I get in this seminary experience is to live in the tension.  It is only through adversity that I will grow and discover when and who I am.  The thing is, I believe that and for once am embracing it.  So if loud music and sleeping all day on a Sat keep me from imploding, so be it.  If I don’t have my health then I don’t have anything.

By the way, the two pics are of my enjoyable trip into Lex this weekend (wahoo Ashley’s new house!) and what I missed by not staying on campus (yeah, balloons were actually on campus).  Oh, and I saw 3:10 to Yuma.  WOW.